Bromance

According to wikipedia, bromance or "man-crush" is a close but non-sexual relationship between two men, a form of homosocial intimacy. Bromance is also the word of the week. From MGG's posts and Jimmy Kimmel's show, they were both talking about bromance. What's up with bromance anyway...

I know how cliche this may seem, but I think everyone has got into this close-bestfriendishh-cute-guy-friend-drama-that-he-fell-in-love-with-but-is-straight-pala-the-whole-time scenario. Yes, people-thats bromance.

I opened my Friendster account a few hours ago and I got this new comment from my old bestfriend from the province. He was swearing at me for not remembering his birthday and at the same time greeting me a happy birthday as he knew our birthdays were both close to each other. I know, long shit.

I met him through my girlfriend. Yes, I did have a girlfriend and I used to be vagitarian. We were actually on the same section at 3rd year but I never really talked to him because I was just plain snobbish back then. He would talk to me in English class when he could'nt understand what the hell the teacher was saying.

One night, after going outside and buying one of my oh-so-favorite empanada (ilocano style), he called me and told me that he got my number from my girlfriend. Yes, my girlfriend. Not that he was a stalker or anything but at first I thought that he was trying to steal my girl. But after getting my number from me girl, we just started on talking on the phone every-fucking-night.

Yeah, he ditched her for me. Ang ganda ko no? hahaha. Since then, we were inseperable. We would talk for 5 hours every night while we both watch tv, eat dinner and make chikka at the same time. We hanged in the morning and talked in the evening. We were like lovers and I was already losing some time with my girlfriend.

It wasn't too soon till I finally broke up with my girlfriend as I found her dragging to how much fun I've had it with him instead. On weekends, we would go out and walk around the city while going for foodtrips.

We even made a habit of making-hatid-sundo to our houses every other day. In relation to that, when it was my turn to bring him home-he would invite me to have dinner with him. I did the same shit, I even made him sleepover when its too late already.

He was the school's heart throb and I was the wise-ass. After spending so much shit with him for 2 fucking years, I fell in love with him and kept it from going out. But before that, before the me-falling-in-love-with-him part, he would always kiss me on the cheeks whenever he leaves. He would hug me like a teddy bear when he sees me drop by at his place.

I was the guy who stayed with him at the hospital when he got into an accident. He was the one who carried me home when I was fucking drunk and vomiting all over on my 15th birthday. On that same night, was the first time that we ever kissed (like lips to lips ba. yes, naloka ako.) Pecks were usual but getting my lips wet by his lips was obviously something else.

After that, I had the mentality that we were having an unspoken relationship. We never kissed again after it, but we were still the same. Hatid, sundo, hugs, and dinner. We grew closer and closer and I grew more in love with him every-fucking-day. Alam mo yun? Yung to the point na you'd sacrifice your life for him?

I was happy like shit when I was with him. Until...until...he had a girlfriend. I know right? What a bitch. After 3rd year, I got placed on the star section while he was left with our old section. We didn't had much time back then but we would always meet when lunch time came and he would come to my place and eat lunch. Sometimes, me at his place and sometimes, us at some cheap food-chain around town.

At Senior's prom, when the last dance came in-he asked me to dance. "Doon tayo sa gitna, pwede?" while reaching his arm out while I was sitting with my ex. I know, awkward much. I got up, and he held my hand while we both walked as people started to stare.

The feeling was priceless but damn, people started giving us weird looks when we were already up the middle. I looked at his face and he smiled at me with his cunning smile. Unfortunately, his girlfriend suddenly came in and tapped his back while we were having our moment. Oo, eksenadora talaga ang girlfriend niyang churlalaloo. In fairview, school singer namin yung girl na itey at maganda ang hitad-yun nga lang may dakotang nunal sa fezlak. But wait, nagpa-alis ng nunal ang baklita after na talak-ever cheverloo sa buong school na ang tawag sa kanya "Nunal." O diba? ang taray.

Long story short, I told him before I left for Manila that I was in love with him. He laughed and told me that he just sees me like a brother. Like, hello? Okay ka lang? Kailan pa merong magkatapid na lalaking naghahalik-halikan ever at may telebabaderz sessions pa everynight? May pa sweet-dreams sweet-dreams pa nga bago bumorlag eh. Letse siya. Kung alam ko lang na wit pala kami talaga ever since, matagal na sana akong rumampa sa mga plaza para humatak ng cute boys no! echos.

Anyway, rumor says na pamhintang taklesa itey ngayon. Nakakalerki diba? Sabagay, bata pa kami noon at hindi pa knowing na pwede palang mag im-tu-im. Like pamhinta ba. Okay lang naman para sa akin eh, basta lang pag-uwi ko (if ever), meron akong saging na uuwian hahaha.

OO na. OO na. Sabaw ako ngayun kasi 4am na at 7am pa ang gising ko. Take note, may report pa akong gagawin later this morning with matching corporate attire. O diba? ang joray ng lola mo. Ganito ata talaga ang efek pag ni keanu reed mo itey booklaloo ni Wanda Ilusyonada.

Before I finish my report and reaction papers,
greeting good 'ol bestfriend a happy happy 18th birthday.

Him with ze lil sister

Frustrations

click at the photos to see its full size.
photos are cropped by blogspot because its too big for it :-(

I was sitting by my usual spot when you last saw me. With my fingers pressed lightly on the shutter and my eyes wandering around for any clues of delusional concepts, I sat dead.

(dedicated to all the cat lovers out there;
you know who you are)

My usual white shirt and green-holed shorts fitted my body pretty well. Both my arms were caught by a chain, a chain that captures time. A time-capturing chain that differs from one eye to another. An imagination stronger than those of porn makers and poets, my eyes can communicate with pixels.

For a minute, I felt lost. "What have I got myself into" I thought. You saw me with confused and lost eyes as you walked down Pine street along with your favorite rubber shoes. I felt numb, like rubber gum stuck on someone else's foot. The complex pool of artists in my head keeps on punching me with their cameras. Competition were everywhere and they were all older, they were all better, they got all the new gadgets, the lightings, the strobes, THE everything, you name it!

Inferiority was kicking in. My plastered smile came off and you saw me with a face sourer than any orange on the face of this unfair world, a face who knew nothing else but the word SAD-was I ever too good enough to be considered an artist?

You knew me quite well. I would call you from your place and you would come on over and say things about my work. Holding my photos up while I try and scrutinize your face with any dash of negativity, you were always fair-giving me the balance of critic. I've always thought you were a liar. Always giving me positive inputs while I know that you were only doing this because you know I'm a kid.

I miss getting bloody brutal comments. Like "its usual, nothing new on it" or "you call that taking pictures? My 2-year old niece can do better than that!" or even "Composition makes no sense and you're making my head ache." Getting those kinds of comments always gave me time to do better.

I can't force it if people can't appreciate pictures. You know what I mean, right? You just stare at a picture and check out if its colors are right and then you try to see if it matches your taste or not. Then you move on with the next shot, making comments about the angle and how awkward it was because your ex-boyfriend was sitting beside you.

You know that I can't please everyone, but my dream job demands me to.

Leaping from my seat, I saw you staring at me. I looked at you and saw the etches of experience running across your face, "I wonder what my old friend has been doing.." I thought while I wave hello and plaster my fake smile on.

"Look at my new shots, Tim."

"That's nice. Is there a problem?"

"Huh? No. I'm okay...I just feel a bit uneasy."

"You look lost sweetie. lost.." looking at me with those piercing brown eyes as I tried to say no with my wooden reflection.

"I can't be lost. I always sit here every Saturday with me handy time-capturing chain!" raising my arm up while holding the camera.

"I meant it figuratively, you know that." He smiled while punching me lightly on my shoulder.

"I'm happy that someone actually does read my pictures." Hugging him tight with my head resting on his shoulder. He wasn't taller than me but his warm skin kept me hot while the cold weather tries to kiss me with her lips.

"Post it. People would love it" he smiled while kissing my cheeks goodbye.

I stood there for thirteen minutes while my right palm grasped that blushing cheek where his lips planted deep. I should've kissed him back, but it wouldn't be right if I were to have any plans on destroying this friendship.

He was nowhere in sight. Lost in the horizon where the angels fly and doves sing goodbye.

Soon I realized that the sun has already gone blue, like true love coming just once in a lifetime-I stood there with my love while I hold its chain and smile at it while we both look at the moon with a pack of orgasm to keep me inspired.

Then he spoke

"You may be lost now, but you'll soon find your own route.
Never give up on that path, never give up with what you love.
Never give up on love"

As for now, I remain....... LOST

Thanking everyone for the support and inspiration :-D
XOXO

Jeepney

I see you a lot everyday. With your distinct aura and piercing eyes matched with those perfect lips, stealing those looks from you were priceless.

My toes would tickle each other as I try to control myself from fidgeting too much, like hormonal highschool teenagers giggling as I see your face smile by the horizon. The plastic window shades flutter as the southern wind scratches its gentle fingers while your hair dances with her grace, I always wondered what your name was or If you ever had a thing for me.

It would always last for thirty minutes. Sometimes faster and sometimes even longer. You were like chocolate, too much would make me sick and getting in just the right amount would give me that rush of endorphans enough to make my day. Sex in your mouth is how my friends would call it, they were right. You were like sex in my mouth.

Sometimes, you give me signs. Sometimes, you just stare right through me as if I were nothing. I composed myself everytime I had a chance to sit right next to you. I gave that much effort to show you my grace-you on otherhand, was effortless as a swan. Sweaty or not, looking fabulous was something I was not built for.

Have you ever thought the way I do? How I fantasized about holding your hand as we both ride our favorite jeepney? Me and you, talking like lovers? It was just all too good to be true, but you always ran off without me as soon as our litle love story ends.

You always had a different mask on. Sometimes you looked like double my age, and on usual occasions, you were just around my age. You wore different clothes. You had glasses on when the sun's just too bright and nifty bright clothes to match our perfect day together. Even it was just your usual thirty minute ride before school, I wouldn't trade it for anything else-even for a brand new car.

How I just wish that in the end of the day, you would come up right to me and ask for my name. Though I do get more than what I bargained for when you touch my legs while you leave me with your usual stop. I never wished for something better than that....

How I just wish I was your usual commuter. Walking like nothing else in the world's bothering me, always leaving blank stares and fake smiles while my pale hands reach and let go for money. Don't you just wish everything in life could be that simple? You let go, you reach out.

Maybe someday. Someday...I'll have the courage. I'll have that courage to run up to you and ask for your name. I'm sick of the suspended animation while I stare and wonder how perfect our life would be if we were together. Living in fairytales is just too young for my taste. I want it to be an action movie, now that I'm growing close to being seventeen.

Next time, don't be a stranger and talk to me. Would'nt that be great? Suspended in time as the whole world revolves around us. No war, no death, no problems and just us while I look at your textured eye and perfect lips. Our love story will always be good for thirty minutes, nothing more, nothing less.

Unless..unless we're planning to make a happily ever after together.

Until next time random stranger. You and me with our favorite ride home; the Jeepeny.

So you want a virgin?

Something fresh? Something you barely knew about? Something just out of the box? If your answer to all these questions is yes, Virgin Labfest 5 would be an awesome treat for you. And if its No, we'll I'm the one you're looking for. choz!Even my fierceness can't handle its awesomeness.

I don't watch plays unless they're free. Yes, I'm one cheap bastard. But something about Virgin Labfest got me interested. So its obviously not its name, right? No. It was its name. Virgin is the perfect world for it; untested, untried and unstaged.

I love watching suicidal plays. Suicidal because you won't really know if its good or not, its either you go home laughing on how ridiculous it all was or you go home smiling and telling all your friends how awesome it is. Its a make or break deal and that's what you'll love about it.

It was also tight. Tight for its numerous guests and star-studded audience (including me). I picked the last Set among the other untried sets. I don't want anything suicidal, if its free at least try out the revised and tested ones. Thus, SET F.

In general, they were all contemporary but timeless. It showed the face of our country and it slapped us all with the horrible truth. That a crazy midget is trying to control our country, how overseas workers seems to be our only way out and how racist we are with our fellow Filipinos.

Ang Kalungkutan ng mga Reyna - Ang Kasiyahan ng Baklita

One word: Fierce.

This perfectly reflects our current president's status. How she tries to make change, and how we want her changed. Though the writer's humor is somewhat out-dated, by the fact that only the 30ishy people would laugh about some of its 70ish jokes, a few couple of modern pop culture jokes were kicked in to pull out some laughter with the younger groups.

A very talented cast who knew a Capella among other things, the script was flawless and the storyline was tasty. A play that's both political and humorous. (How you rarely put those two words in one sentence and just how amazing the writer was to pull it off.)

Uuwi na ang Nanay kong si Darna - Uuwi na rin ako para matulog.

One word: Lame

A story about your typical DH working at Hongkong while trying to support her family's daily needs. One of the things I loved about this is the amount of effort they gave out to making the costumes. Well they definitely need it anyway, for without it-I'd rather burn my lungs out in the process.

Everything was expected besides the random talking stuffed-toy. A kid misses his mom, Mom plays as a superhero at some home in HK, Mom kicks monsters' ass, then Mom decides to come home. I just wished it was more in-depth like the other two plays were. I know that its trying to tell us how awesome this DHs are and how they shouldn't be taken for granted, but we're not showing this play to primary students or highschoolers-we're talking about educated people here. Basta, it was all tooo predictable.

and last but not the least, and definitely my favorite

Ang Bayot, Ang Meranao at ang Habal-Habal sa Isang Nakababagot na Paghihintay sa Kanto ng Lanao del Norte -Mahaba talaga siya.


One word: Awesome.

Only two actors were rolled in but damn were they good. It was the longest, it was the funniest and definitely the best play to finish off the awesome trilogy.

The title says it all, Ang Bayot, Ang Meranao at ang Habal-Habal sa Isang Nakababagot na Paghihintay sa Kanto ng Lanao del Norte

It reflected more than one problem than to what we people face; homophobia, prejudice, racism, ignorance, and discrimination. The script was perfect and so were it's cast. Besides the hundred laughter these two actors got us into, they also showed us the truth to how people are now. I wouldn't get sick of watching this play over and over again and paying the whole set by just watching this on repeat would be just plausible.

***********************************

4.2/5 stars

Definitely something that I won't get sick off. The lining was perfect as Uuwi na ang nanay kong si darna got the momentum just right as it catapulted us to its last show. A well concocted chemisty among actors and very talented writers. Virgin Labfest, now tried, now tested, and definitely something to wet your pants with.

In the end, it was all mixed emotions. But one thing's for sure.
It definitely got me home smiling.

*fingers-crossed*

Athletes and me

I was looking at him by the corner of my eye as I drink my usual Frappuccino. Like what weakdays do on a usual Wednesday morning, I can't have my usual fabulous facade as an entree, I wish my shitty look would suffice for his beauty.

I later found out that his name is Jacob. A Football player from the Ateneo, as how all of my exes say it. I find him perfect with composure. How he has this certain control of how he moves, an economy of movement like no other. He's outspoken, witty and with excellent manipulation of history.

*************************************

I don't personally know him. But I do remember him on one sunny Tuesday morning. Along the cold corridors of St. Benilde lies this row of chairs, like an airport waiting for its passengers he sat there with his crutches and a bag of burger as he looks at the nearby garden. Serenity was in his eyes and wishing to be stuck there for a lifetime was inevitable.

There was no spark of interest in me. He had nothing special nor does he have any distinct piercing features. I wasn't really sure on why I'm utterly addicted to him now but there's one thing I'm quite sure off, he's one cute son-of-a-bitch.

Seeing him on a weekly basis wasn't surprising. We would see each other up the usual corridor, he had no more crutches with him and he walked gracefully like an athlete. Just looking at his agile figure wants to make a race with him. Sigh. If it weren't for my weak and physically-deficient genepool I would've invited him for a jog. Maybe, just maybe...

I see him at the library browsing for books for his history class, talking to one of our common friends every Thursday afternoon at the cafeteria, and walking by taft as he looks around for something/someone. He was just really mysterious, just like a book waiting to be read and on how that last line was just so cliche. He could be the one, like all of my exes were.

The last time I saw his graceful steps was at the Discipline's office. Like any other student losing his ultimate key to passing our gates, losing this key is one of my habits. Sometimes I leave it, sometimes I don't. I guess this is how destiny works; getting us both in trouble and getting us stuck in the same room at the same day with the same usual bullshit of losing our ID.

With my supreme google-fu at hand, I later found out that he is 20. As I said, a transferee from ADMU as LIT major and a football player. It all fitted perfectly! So thats why he was wearing those crutches the first day.

****************************************

I can now see him looking at me. With his piercing eyes passing through me.I felt like melting with just the idea of it. But I was wrong, he was looking pass me, outside the store; where the busy streets of Taft come and go and where vendors yell and bikes trample. I looked in unison to where he was staring and I see nothing but your usual cars, trucks, and jeeps. Maybe.just maybe, over my unbelievable dream-he was looking at me.

I blushed. I flipped a couple of more pages. I looked at him.

Our eyes met and he suddenly moved his head to focus on what he was reading; bundles and dozens of papers from his history books. I kept on looking at him every time I finish a chapter. With his wooden-brown eyes scanning the room every half hour or so, I would smirk in the background while I carry on and read my Prada.

He stood up after an hour and he walked behind me. I moved my chair as I wait for his excuse. His voice came in like expected with a rasping sound of constraint and confusion, "Excuse me."

How I wish it were a Hy or Hello, a friendly gesture that would just sky-rocket this awkward tension. He came back, got to read his papers again and out of nowhere this obnoxious Korean just moved between us. UGH. Perfect! Just what I needed, a Korean sitting between us, covering my view of his beauty.

I wanted to talk to him. I wanted to know his name, how is he, and if he lives near Vito Cruz. Like a bedside reporter to how I would describe it, he had this aura that would just trap any predator's eyes on him. Since then on, I wanted him just for my own.

But of course, this were my thoughts when I had no idea of who he was and how he was just this shroud on the scorching desserts of Saudi Arabia. Now, he was clearer. A STOP sign located down the street, he was THAT visible. Red, Big, and Visible.

After two hours, he got up and pulled his bag up to his shoulder. Then walked by a different route, not touching my skin and not hearing my voice. By then on, I thought I wouldn't see him anymore. I thought, that somewhere deep in his system, he felt awkward. I kept on reading brain-washing myself that nothing ever happened. I'm reading a book, not looking at boys.

I felt hopeless then on. But just by the horizon, I saw him sitting perpendicular to where I was. Sitting outside the glass window with the air between us separating each other and the 3-inch glass muting us with our voices. Is he giving off signs? Is he trying to tell something? I don't know, I have no idea.

So I went out, to a table next to him while I whip out my Dunhills and lighter. I lighted one up, sipped, inhaled then breathed out fresh air. I was calculating ways of approaching him, I was trying to make sense of all the signs and misinterpreted nosebleeds. I don't want to be mistreated, I don't want to humiliated.

Looking at his face for any sign of interest. He seems to be uninterested. Like Nina Garcia browsing through this year's rising fashion-designers. No one was new, no one was chic, no one is fashion.

So I stood up, grabbed my bag and dragged my ass out of the store. Telling myself "Boys, my dear are everywhere. Why exert too much effort while they could be the one running for you."

Since I've come home,
well my body's been a mess
and I miss your tender hair,
and the way you like to dress.

p.s. Is it just me or are varsity jocks the usual on my menu lately?